Reasons I loathe rubber neckers.

Today, as I was driving back from school, traffic began to slow to snail pace.

Why?

Skipping a long lead-in, which even I expect of myself -- a wreck.

Where?

On the other side of the road.

It's nonsensical, you say, for Wendover Avenue to turn into a snail race in the middle of the day because an accident has happened on the other side of the road.

And you say it for good reason. It makes no sense.

What is it about wrecks? People see the flashing police lights and, like really ADD moths, are drawn to the sight? Or are we just programmed to look at someone else's tragedy?

Well, neither. People are just morons.

I got to thinking as I sat in traffic so others could get a nice long look at the fender-bender on the other side of the lane. The reason I hate these people so greatly is because I've seen, first hand, the effects of rubber necking.

It was two years ago, and I was laboriously driving la macchina to high school. IB English 12. Ms. Rozelman. Oh, the days. Anyway, as I was sitting at a light on Friendly Ave, the lady behind me had got it into her head that the light was green, and immediately set her foot on the accelerator. She plummeted into me. She had only one contact in because my car interrupted her in the middle of her morning multi-tasking usual. Anyway, we got out, she was mad (she didn't have insurance, though she worked at an insurance agency), I started crying, my bumper started falling off, et cetera et cetera. All of Friendly was there to see. And that's a damn busy road in the morning. About 15 minutes into the ordeal, a car in the right-hand lane (we're in the median nearer to the left-hand lane) smashes into two cars in front of it. I get out of the driver's seat to look and, literally a second later, a truck in the left-hand lane -- which is going fairly fast for the morning commute -- runs into the car in front of him, propelling it forward.

Obviously, I started crying again.

Seven cars on the side of the road: Five of which as a result of rubber necking; all of which as a result of drivers directing their attention to someone (or something) else rather than the task at hand. Now, I felt kind of bad for the truck driver; I'd probably be a bit startled for a second, too, if I'd just seen three cars hit each other on my right and a stagnant accident on my other side. The driver of the car he hit seemed to be amiable about the whole thing, which makes me think he wasn't rubber necking, just thrown off.

That situation was ridiculous. My accident wasn't bad. We pulled to the side of the road, in no one's way, and waited until someone came to get all the information. I understand human nature. It's not as annoying when there are multiple ambulances surrounding a wreck that looks awful. You want to see if the people involved are OK. In some cases, you want to see if you can help. I don't know, though, whether slow-moving and highly concentrated traffic would be better or worse for ambulance drivers. But when there's an accident on the other side of the road, or a fender-bender on your side, to slow down to such an extent that traffic is at almost a standstill until the miraculous barrier is lifted once you pass the accident is awful. It's unnecessary. There is a happy medium between gaging your surroundings, settling your natural desire to look, and driving safely.

It's only a slight annoyance.

Obviously.